Lengthen the exhale and stop trying to make yourself tired; you already are. Wired-and-tired is an idle stuck high after the demand has gone. Ten minutes of six breaths a minute, lying down, eyes closed, hands on the belly, does more than another hour of scrolling, and the Unravel afterward is for whatever the ten minutes uncover.
The steps
- Lie down. Hands on the belly. Eyes closed or soft.
- Six breaths a minute, exhale longer, for ten minutes. Do not aim for sleep.
- Soundcheck: where is the holding? Jaw and belly, usually.
- An Unravel aimed there: exhale-weighted breaths scaled to the size of it.
- If thoughts race, count the exhales to ten and start over. Losing count is fine.
- Then decide: rest, or the one thing. Not the list.
When not to, and when to get help instead
If this is most nights for weeks, that is insomnia or something adjacent and worth a clinician; CBT-I is the treatment with evidence. Not a technique for the drive home.
What the research says
Slow breathing raises vagal activity and lowers reported anxiety in single sessions, more so in older adults in one study. Slow paced breathing before bed improved sleep onset in a small insomnia study. The “stop aiming for sleep” instruction is borrowed from CBT-I’s paradoxical intention, which has trial support.
Other methods people use
Progressive muscle relaxation lying down is the long-form version and well studied. A warm shower raises then drops body temperature, which helps sleep onset. Yoga nidra recordings work for many people and are essentially a guided version of this.
Questions people also ask
Why can't I relax even when I'm exhausted?
The demand has ended and the idle has not come down. Fatigue and arousal are separate dials. The exhale turns the second one.
Is it bad to lie down and do breathing exercises instead of sleeping?
No. Ten minutes of slow breathing lying down is restful in its own right, and it often turns into sleep when you stop trying.
In the book
Techniques
Rooms
Two rules, no exceptions
Never practice any technique on this site while you are driving, operating machinery, or doing anything that needs your full attention. The slow ones can make you drowsy, faster than you’d expect. And never practice a breath-hold, bellows breath, or any vigorous breathing in or near water. Read Before you begin for the doctor’s list and the rest.
More in “The workday”
- What's a quick breathing exercise I can do at my desk?
- How do I stay calm in a meeting that won't end?
- How do I breathe before a difficult conversation?
- How do I stay calm when someone is yelling at me?
Written by Eric Bradley. Last reviewed October 2026. One performer’s craft, offered for general information; not medical advice, mental health treatment, or a substitute for care.